At this moment, I am preparing for the writing workshop/cruise that I'm flying off to on Friday. My brain is largely scrambled because of everything this involves, so all I'm good for this week is an extended, scattered ramble about everything going through my head right now. I'll understand if you pass on reading this.
At this moment, I am freaked the hell out because the thing I signed up for means a published author is going to read a little bit of STARWIND and give me advice on it. I've never heard of this author and haven't read anything they've written; I put them on my list because I thought they sounded like they might like my work. I have no idea how to handle this.
At this moment, I am fully aware that no matter how long a list I make or how much I try to prepare for the trip, I'm going to forget something or screw something up.
At this moment, I am kicking myself and have been for many days, because I thought we got to sign up for more than one critique thing on the cruise and we only got one. This is what I get for not reading carefully enough. I thought I'd get a group/peer critique of book stuff along with the author read. I was wrong. I'm not sure which of the two would be more helpful, but it's not like I'll find out now.
At this moment, I am suffering from one of the worst colds I've ever had. I've been beating it down with medicine since Saturday and I hope it'll go away by the time I have to leave the house on Friday morning.
At this moment, I am wishing I'd never listened to a new song by someone whose music I usually enjoy, because it reminded me of everything I feel when I'm depressed and have completely lost faith in my work and am wishing I could quit writing. A song shouldn't make me feel like quitting, like all the work I've done will never amount to anything. But it did. No, I'm not naming the artist, and I'm damn well not linking the song - I'm trying to forget I ever heard it.
At this moment, I am debating whether to buy the wi-fi package on the cruise ship. It would be nice to keep a connection, but there's some appeal to being largely unplugged for a week. But some of the cruise-goers are saying they've found having constant internet access on board to be helpful for communicating and all that, so I probably will.
At this moment, I am deliberately not taking out that piece of small paper that has story notes on a new version of the tale that's been frustrating me for months that I've talked about before. It's a weird thing to not want to work on a story and still hope it works out somehow.
At this moment, I am really wishing tomorrow's therapy appointment hadn't been canceled.
At this moment, I am trying to figure out a story that started as one thing and developed an entirely new thing as I did some world-building. I'm wondering if it's all going to end up compatible or if this will be yet another damn plot I end up ditching no matter how much I want to write it because I just couldn't make everything I created work together.
At this moment, I am more than ready to make some tea and then get to bed. I've been exhausted since I got back from DragonCon and no amount of sleep has helped.
At this moment, I am done with this and wishing I'd come up with something else to write this week.
Deep breath! It will be all right. Just plan for what you can and don't worry about the rest.
ReplyDeleteYou may only get one official critique, but you'll be on a boat for several days with many authors and writers. Form your own groups and help each other out.
Enjoy the opportunity and keep cramming the cold drugs.
I'm doing my best! I'm soon to head out and I think I've taken care of everything I can. It's the ridiculous amount of unknowns that's getting to me, no matter how ridiculous I know that is. >_<
DeleteDid you make your tea?
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty excited for you about going on the cruise. That's awesome. Crossing my your cold lets up enough for you to enjoy it. It does suck about the mix-up with the critiquing sessions. I'm hoping the one you picked ends up being majorly helpful.
Can you squash the depressive song with a happy playlist?
I did have my tea, yes. ^_^ And I'm hoping things go well, trying to work my way toward being excited instead of stressing. Hopefully I'll get there by the time I get on the boat.
DeleteUnless you have kids at home, going unplugged is the only way to cruise. Easier to enjoy--and if it's a writing thing, easier to do some actual writing too. You're going to have such a good time. You really are. Put your nerves aside and get ready to be at ease.
ReplyDeleteI was going to go that route, but a lot of the people in the writing group are planning and preparing to do stuff on the cruise, and it's all going on through a Google group, so making sure I stay connected sounded like my best option. Yay for wi-fi?
DeleteMeh. I'd rather enjoy the ship and destinations. ;)
DeleteDon't. Freak. Out.
ReplyDeleteHeck. I'm a published author, and I want to read STARWIND. Trust me. I'm not that big a deal. :) My opinions are just opinions, and so are the opinions of the author on your cruise.
As for all the other story ideas nibbling at your toes ... Good. You've got lots of ideas waiting in the wind, which you will need to distract you when STARWIND goes a-querying and/or on sub.
I only worry when I have no new ideas. :)
Eh, I think it's different because I sort of know you from this whole online thing and because you asked to read the book. >_< But you're right, and I'll try to stop worrying about it. She could end up really liking the book.
DeleteAnd trust me, I will never run out of ideas...
I hope you feel better by the time you leave. And don't freak out! I once had a literary agent lead my manuscript critique session. I damn near hyperventilated until it dawned on me that she was just a regular person who just so happened to be an agent. I think you'll learn a lot from this experience and I hope you have fun. Can't wait to hear all about it!
ReplyDeleteI did feel better by the time I left - once I was actually up and at the airport, I mostly settled. Except for that half-hour stopover. O_o Gotta love dashing out of the plane and hoping the next one's not across the airport...
DeleteAwwww, I'm sorry I didn't get to see this before you shipped out. First and foremost: there's no need to panic because you are already doing more than the rest of the world for your writing: you are out there seeking help, and that's a big, scary, hard, thrilling, and sometimes helpful step. Having the courage to go through with that alone is often the part that stops writers in their tracks. Good luck, have fun, and try to enjoy what time you have.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I read this when much of the workshop was done, and it helped me remind me that I'd had nothing to worry about.
Delete