Wednesday, August 12, 2015

Query Letters Must Die.

I don't know how many of y'all follow me on Twitter, but as I tweeted about two days ago, I've started working on the query for The Book of Lost Runes.  And let's just say it's not going well.

Yes, this is the part where I rant.

I feel like this shouldn't be so difficult.  I've been writing queries since 2001.  No, not continuously; I'm reasonably productive, but I'm not that productive, and there was that long dry spell where I hardly wrote anything worth a damn because I was trying to write short stories for publication and everything that came out of that period was crap except for one single piece.  But in theory, I should know what I'm doing.

'Theory' is an incredibly useful word, especially when it serves as an indication that whatever I'm theorizing to be true is utterly and completely not.

To be honest, BoLR is not a book that's easy to summarize.  A significant event occurs ten years before the story even starts, and while I cover that in the first chapter (without resorting to infodumps, yay me), that's presents two problems.  First, it's an essential element for the two main characters, so how can I summarize it in the query?  Second, since it's not actually part of the story's events, do I need to include it?

If you've noticed that these problems are contradictory, then I hope you see why summarizing this story is such a pain in the ass.

I almost wish I'd written the crazy dream book first and edited that one, because I already know exactly how that query's going to go.  But I think BoLR has a higher chance of actually being published, mostly because it's not insane.

Anyway.  There's also the fact that the essential conflict of BoLR changes over the course of the book.  What starts off as a blackmail/revenge plot turns into the discovery of a serious problem involving both the main characters' homes.  In all of my query attempts so far, getting that plot twist across has involved a lot more words than a query letter should have.  I've heard the average query letter is around three hundred words, so I doubt many agents would look favorably on one that's a full five hundred words long.

Finally, there's the whole romance thing.  It's pretty clear in the story itself - as I've said here before, the relationship upgrade happens in chapter two - but it's part of the plot in ways I can't cover effectively in a query letter.  I know I'll mention it when I query agents who specifically want books with LGBT couples, but that means I have to find a way to fit it in that doesn't affect the letter if it's taken out, which is yet another issue.  I'll probably leave it in no matter what.

The one upside is that I've figured out an essential part: how to end it.  That's been the only easy part.  I took the quick description I came up with for the book and worked that into the final paragraph, so no matter what happens with the rest of the query, I get my pseudo-blurb in there at the end:

Airships, blackmail, and ancient magic collide in THE BOOK OF LOST RUNES, a fantasy novel of 80,000 words.  Thank you for your consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.

Next week: I might have a query to share and request critique for, perhaps two.  Or I might have taken up drinking heavily.

15 comments:

  1. Do sites like Query Tracker offer assistance with queries? Maybe it is time to get a little help. Better than beating your head on the keyboard.

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    1. I've heard of the site, but I've never been there. I'll take a look and see if it can help me out. Thanks!

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  2. I don't think this is out of the ordinary - queries SUCK. I hate writing them. I always end up tortured and miserable trying to do it.

    I will say this, though: I haven't finished TBLR (I'm working on it!!!) but so far, over halfway through, I don't think you need to go too far into the ten year old back story. Just a basic summary with tantalizing hints will do it. You know, "It's Shiloh's fault that her family's been ruined. One reckless choice, and their fortunes were lost. So when a chance comes for her to redeem herself and her family, she grabs it - never mind that it involves working closely with the family that destroyed hers in the first place." Just better-written than that, of course :)

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    1. That's actually a really good start, much better than what I've been doing. ^_^ I'll see what I can do, thanks.

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  3. Yep, Query Tracker offers lots of help (That's where I started years ago). I personally find it helpful to fill in this one little sentence from Nathan Bransford and go from there. "When OPENING CONFLICT happens to CHARACTER(s), they have OVERCOME CONFLICT to COMPLETE QUEST." I know this is majorly, terribly, overly to the extreme simplified. But start there. Even the most complex stories can be bared down to it with force.

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    1. Simplified is what I'm looking for, so yes, I'm definitely going to check out Query Tracker. Especially with two recommendations. A template like that might be very helpful.

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  4. Good luck though, I'd love to see bolr in the cinema one day!! Squeeeee lots of girly kisses :3 about time we had a blockbuster with a girl/girl lead!!!

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    1. I'll settle for published of course, but who will be able to resist when they read it, it just flies off the page already!

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    2. Lots of writers would love to see books made of their movies. :P I don't have a great deal of hope for that, but you never know.

      Granted, having an F/F couple would keep it from being shown in some countries. I think I'd promote piracy for those countries' residents, in that case.

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  5. Matt McNish has excellent advise for query writing at his blog: http://theqqqe.blogspot.com/ You can see examples of successful queries there as well as critiques of queries. I find that he recommends the approach of Character, Conflict, and Stakes. My personal recommendation is that you make sure whatever is unique about your book gets into the query. Don't worry about spoilers. If you have a jaw-dropping plot twist, put it in the query. That's the kind of thing that will catch an agent's eye.

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    1. Thanks for the link, I'll check that out. I haven't heard it phrased as "Character, Conflict, and Stakes" before, but I recognize those as things I've seen others say must be in the query. And yes, the query totally spoils things for my book.

      As for uniqueness, I'm still using the phrase "airships, blackmail, and ancient magic", which I think is pretty unique. ^_^

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  6. Stupid blogger ate my long, well thought out comment on queries.

    Short version: Go here http://www.adamheine.com/2012/04/common-query-problem-also-kung-fu-panda.html

    he has a way of talking about queries that's a little different from other people, and it's more fun. Still, the protag wants x, the villain wants Y, if Z happens CONSEQUENCES, version pretty much sums it up.

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    1. Blogger seems to eat a lot of your comments. O_o But thanks for the link, I'll take a look at that. I'm hoping to have two queries whipped into shape for a blog entry this week, so we'll see how that goes.

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  7. The only way to write a query letter is to stab yourself in the eye. Otherwise, it can't be done. I know you'll figure it out eventually, but in the meanwhile, step away from it and then go back to it. It might also help for some people who have read the novel (or will read it) to give you some feedback on it. They might be able to help you with things that are essential and things that aren't.

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    1. Yeah, sounds about right. >_< I did some work on the queries this past Thursday and Friday, then stepped away for the weekend, and I'll get back to them tomorrow in prep for a blog entry. Here's hoping when I look at them tomorrow, I don't actually feel like stabbing anything.

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